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Red_Scout
Posts: 23
Joined: 06/27/2005
Credibility: 0 pts
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| Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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Hey guys. How you? Me? I'm not good at all. Turns out my girlfriend has either dumped, or is dumping me and already moved on to another guy without even telling me a thing. I'm mentally cracking up... I was trying so hard to save the relationship when it turns out that she's already with the guy. I've been leaving messages on her phone asking her to call me and talk to me about the situation, but I don't get the satisfaction of a Dear John letter. I get nothing but confusion and a whole lot of anger right now. I don't know if she really has left me or using a friend to tell me that she with him. All I want is for her to tell me what's going on and I can't even get that.
I know I'm not the best guy in the world. I'm not good looking, I'm not in shape and I'm not the nicest either but I don't deserve shit like this. All I want ever in this life is a reason to live, I would sacrifice anything for a woman that loved me. I was ready and willing to throw everything into the wind for her, I gave up personal feelings in what I like for a woman just to accept her. And she goes around and does this to me.
I really do wish I was dead inside then nothing would get me cause right now I can't pull that damn trigger when I desperately want to.
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| 02/01/07 06:15 |
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bigspeer
Posts: 3
Joined: 02/22/2006
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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my advice: go to bed. i bet your sitting at your computer at 430 am waiting for someone to respond cause i know i would be doing the same thing. if she's pulling that crap, she's definately not worth it, and since you compromised your values just for a chance at her, i'd say she DEFINATELY isnt worth it.
go to the store and get some oreos and milk, eat half the bag cause you just cant eat one, then go to bed and sleep until you have to get up for work or whatever. just put this girl on your ignore list and forget about her.
and your not as bad looking as some of the site managers around here... oh wait, the forums are working again? *looks for the off switch on the servers*
My New House - Almost Done Moving In...
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| 02/01/07 06:28 |
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Nakoma
Posts: 0
Joined: 01/18/2005
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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My advice? Stop blaming yourself for her faults. I see this all the time: "What did I do to drive her away?"
The fact is, that it is probably in her personality to cheat and to look for something that seems like a better opportunity, and she will probably do it to the new guy, too. The fact that she did it behind your back and now will not talk about it shows a great deal of immaturity, and also speaks volumes about how guilty she is in the part she is playing.
You are better off for it, even if you don't realize it now. She wasn't the right one for you, and is not worth fighting for (especially when the fight is against her own nature), nor is she worht the anguish you are causing yourself. Trust me when I tell you this: she will not be the last woman you ever meet, and someday you will realize that you are MUCH better off without her. Try to get some rest.
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| 02/01/07 06:43 |
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swissarmy68
GameAmp Staff
Posts: 5
Joined: 07/08/2005
Credibility: -10 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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To tell you the truth Red, I thought I was reading a page from my journal, from quite a few years ago...
Normally I am not one to tell someone I know how they feel. That doesn't seem to mean much to the person who is hurting. I can feel for their situation, and I can pray for them, but normally I don't tell them I know how they feel.
All I want to say right now is, I have gone through very similar circumstances, I have an idea of the pain you are feeling. Again, I know it doesn't always make you feel better now but know that I am thinking and praying about you.
My girlfriend of 3 years (who I figured I would be marrying) came home for a weekend from college and was talking that we should slow our relationship down and see other people... What...? All that year she had be talking about these friends she hangs with, and she would continually bring up the name of one of the guys. I had my questions...
I went up to surprise her one weekend and she pretty much blew me off because she already had plans with "the group" (of which this guy was part of). Needless to say, the next time she came home she said it was over. Really? You think?
That was not a good few month for me after that. I wish I would have had a game like this for a distraction and friends like the people on this site... but no. I many times thought I should just end it, that it would be easier.
Please Red, know that it is not easier that way. Things will start to get better. I am scared when I read that those thoughts are in your head. I know what those thoughts feel like and how loud they can scream sometimes. To the point where that is all you hear.
Don't listen to them. Remember all the people here that appreciate you and look forward to when they can team up with you. You make an impact everyday here...
Be sad... be angry... be depressed... It is ok to feel that way. But, start to make a choice. Accept it is over and try to see the positive things in your life. It is not going to be easy, I wouldn't want to go through that again, believe me. But know that you will get through it. Just hang on tight for now.
By the way... I am now happily married to a wonderful woman for going on 15 years, and I have 3 awesome kids. Had I married that other girl, I know that I would not have the great life I have now. Sometimes what we think is horrible, turns out to have been the best thing that could have happened.
You just have to get through the pain...
Swiss
This space is currently under construction
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| 02/01/07 07:07 |
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Phedre_D
GameAmp Staff
Posts: 433
Joined: 05/09/2005
Credibility: 26 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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I bet you didn't call her Phe-Phe. If you would, everything would have been peachy.
***FEELS KINDA NAKED WITHOUT A SIGGIE***
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| 02/01/07 07:07 |
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BishopDon
GameAmp Staff
Posts: 10
Joined: 04/19/2005
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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My take on it is, you're better off without her.
If you have to be a different person to be with this woman, then it was doomed from the start.
I had a situation similar to this some years ago and I have to tell you, things will get brighter. A lady I was with all of a sudden just felt like she didn't want anything to do with me and cutt off all communications. She gave no reasoning behind it or anything, however, through a mutual friend, I found out she was seeing someone else.
It hurt because she didn't tell me, however, it was definitely a blessing in disguise. If I would have tried to make reason out of that whole thing or kept trying to hunt her down for an explanation, I would never have been open to receive my beautiful wife.
Moral is, get over it and move forward, there are bigger and brighter woman in your future.
Oh, yeah Big, I'll keep that little comment in my mental roladex for later...
**sends an evil stare in Big's direction**
***Looking for new content***
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| 02/01/07 07:11 |
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Sapir
GameAmp Staff
Posts: 54
Joined: 10/07/2005
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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Red, you gotta get a grip. And I mean that in the best possible way, man. I was just about where you are at when I was 22. Just got 'Dear John'ed by my fiancee', alone in a foreign country, yada yada yada. Okay, I was in great shape because the military does that to you, but I was in a right state. Feeling like I was a worthless piece of trash with nothing going for me. Finally, my best friend on Base got back from leave in Germany, and he helped get me blithering drunk. NOT a good idea! BUT after getting violently ill things started to clear up in my head. I was more embarassed by being such a twit in front of my friends than I was hurt by that woman. Oh, sure, I still had to heal inside, but I realized something through my stupor. Those guys who let me get 'faced', watched me whine and cry like a little girl, saw me at the depths of my despair (melodramatic aint I); were also the guys who picked me up when I was barely able to walk, drove me home, directed me to the 'bowl', and made sure I made it to my bed to passout, and then didnt even mention the subject again. THOSE were my friends! Did the woman do that? She was already hooked up with another dweeb by that time.
Okay, that may sound a little disjointed, and Lord knows I was disjointed at the time, but you cant hang your hopes, dreams, LIFE on another person; especially one of the opposite sex. Am I against women? Am I some sort of misogyne? Not at all. I now have a lovely wife, a couple of meh-decent enough kids (getting to be teens, what can I say), and two dogs. BUT I would have none of that if I had let some woman rule over my heart and mind. You gotta do that yourself. Besides, to be completely honest, you are TOO YOUNG to even have a girlfriend. I know, I know. 'But I want to share my life and love, and be loved in return!' Blah, blah, blah. Didnt work this time, did it? Listen to the voice of Experience: until you can like who you look at in the mirror, and live with yourself ALONE, not caring if you ever 'fall in love again'; you HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to offer someone of the opposite sex.
You will do what you're gonna do, but please think on my words. You think/thought you were in love, but I'm gonna say right now that you WERE NOT IN LOVE. Hard to hear? It's the God's Honest Truth. You dont seem to be able to love yourself. How the heck can you love someone else? When you can look in the mirror and love the person staring back at you, and when you can be completely self-sufficient, not needing anyone's love to get you through your day THEN, and only then, will you be ready and able to love someone. Until then you will just be infatuated, and obssessed. Reread you own post. Do you like what is written there? Do you like how you sound? Would you respect someone who talked like that?
You may think my advice is garbage, but when you finally maturely look at it; you will realize that it is true. I've been there; I know. Forget about her, and you will be one step closer to being a man. Would you rather be 'her' (or some other woman's) little puppy dog, or your own confident man. The choice is yours.
BTW 106.9 Free FM out of San Francisco; Monday thru Friday 3pm to 7pm, The Tom Leykis Show. That is the closest affiliate to you in Fairfield. Listen. You might just learn something.
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| 02/01/07 07:32 |
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Grifter0408
GameAmp Staff
Posts: 12
Joined: 11/30/2004
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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Sorry to hear the news Red but unfortunately I am going to have to lock this thread. I understand its a sad time for you but to be honest we need less of these post on the site. I specifically talked about this in my news post concerning forums.
I can be labeled the bad guy for locking topic but its better this way. And its my responsibility to try and maintain forums that stay somewhat related to topic. I hope your situation improves, hate to see Ampers in dire straights but things could be vastly worse. If anyone has any concerns with me locking this thread please feel free to PM me.
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| 02/01/07 07:42 |
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linkmaxwell
Posts: 0
Joined: 01/17/2005
Credibility: 0 pts
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| RE: Am I THAT Bad of a Person? |
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| QUOTE | | I really do wish I was dead inside then nothing would get me cause right now I can't pull that damn trigger when I desperately want to. |
Please, PLEASE don't pull that trigger! However bad you're hurting, whatever that girl did to you, you're still loved. I understand how painful it can feel to have something like this happen, but, however hoaky it sounds, life does go on.
TRIUMPH
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| 02/01/07 07:50 |
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