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jaffar_al_kahyet
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Well this week has been quite a bad week for me, on monday night a friend of mine with no warning committed suicide. As you can imagine it's been a shock for me, and has really hit me hard, and I've been having strange feelings inside which I was saying to my mum is like a hollow feeling. Then, I was online today with 2 of my closest friends on guildwars who i've known for over 2 years, Anna and Jess, we where in a mission together and we all suddenly stopped at the exact same moment. Both my friends said to me with no warning, "I feel strange" and i had exactly the same feeling. We sat and talked for a while and all described the same feelings. Then jess said to me "I feel like something bad is going to happen" I asked what she meant and she described her frined saying to her she was going to set her room on fire... something hit at that moment and i was like ok this is wierd. My friend had taken his life by setting his room on fire, and the girl who had said she was going to to jess hadn't heard anything about my friend. We all where a bit freaked out and had this feeling of something bad looming, its really odd and i'm quite scared by it. I don't know whats going on, but I really feel odd.. I just wanted to talk to people about it.
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| 04/30/08 15:51 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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Ok it just got even more odd, 3 more friends who we hadn't said anything to randomly said they where feeling worried today, none of them had talked to any of us today and another friend of mine came to me on msn and said he was also feeling strange. There are now 7 of us who all have the same feelings, it's as if something is about to happen...
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 04/30/08 16:08 |
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furball
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Sorry to hear about your loss mate.
As for the feelings me and my mate get those. Whenever one of us feels bad the other one does too. Strange stuff.
Hope you get better
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| 04/30/08 16:24 |
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Skittle Cody
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Sorry to hear of your loss.
Someone at school recently did the same, though I didn't know her.
Wow, that's VERY strange.
Watch your back.
Buy me a giraffe <3
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| 04/30/08 16:26 |
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Forumite
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Really Really Really touches the borders of whatever people believe in, scientificly you cannot really prove anything, i mean there's no ''seemingly'' possible connection over a distance that people can feel the same "odd" sense, yet they do.
Anyways, im not here for mumbo jumbo as i refrain from that subject alltogether, i encourage you to say your own opinion, stop there aswel, we don't need religions and belief's colliding, its how most wars start, not here.
Sad to hear Man, best of luck, here's some of my Optimism if it can be transferred over the Net, im sure it peps you up a bit.
Nothing to do about it, by all means do not feel guilty or pretend you could've done something to prevent it, by sudden im presuming he never ever mentioned it, let alone showed signs.
People can just get pushed so much into a corner, and then there is simply for their state of mind, no bloody way out anymore.
You can disagree, everyone would, and righteously so, but at that moment, that minute the thought became act, anyone walking through that dark abyss in his or her mind wouldn't turn away anymore.
The only bad thing is that he probably lived with a mask on for quite some time, as he (most likely reading your post) didn't talk about it, didn't show anything, and was just acting more or less normal as always.
Something went bad behind the scenes, and he played all fun & games in front of you, that's what i think is the worst thing and it really comes as a shock, the fact that your friend was not at all the person you knew him for, all that time pretending :/
Good Luck Man.
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| 04/30/08 16:34 |
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HackingHippie89
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shit like thats tough to deal with, lost my father almost a year ago to cancer
On the strange feeling note though if you're much of a reader id suggest The Sense of Being Stared At by Rupert Sheldrake, it deals with alot of things down that alley, you may like it
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| 04/30/08 16:45 |
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Blazings
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Wow.. I'm just speechless..
Sorry to hear that you lost a good friend and I think it's really cool of you to share this with us. I think stuff like that can really happen. Heared a story once of a clockmaker. He died at 5am and ALL the clocks he ever fixed froze at that exact time..
Really not sure what more there is to say, so before I'm starting to say stupid things, I'll end my post here.
I wish you the best with processing all this.
~Blazings
EDIT: Not going completely off-topic, but @HackingHippie: I know (a bit) how you feel about your father. My father has had cancer twice when I was a child, though he survived.. Really an unfair disease.
***THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED***
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| 04/30/08 16:49 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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Thank you all for your replies, I appreiciate it =)
And forumite what you described is exactly how it is, he always masked it and I guess in the situation he felt he had no choice. He'd recently lost his father to cancer, i feel awful for his mum, we're making her a book with a little note from everyone to look back on his life =]
And Hippy i'll definatly look into it, I get feelings like this quite a lot and i'm quite empathetic towards others even if i don't realise it. It really is odd though, all of us are having the exact same feelings of something looming, but it's just really odd i can't explain it. Another thing is today I didn't go to college because of these feelings, and about 6 different friends texted me during the day asking if i was ok. And I mean ok normaly if i'd been away for a few days i'd get some texts but not just on the same morning, it's like everyone is worried. I also keep feeling a strange presence around me, I know it sounds a load of rubbish but It really is like someones here with me, trying to tel me something.
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 04/30/08 16:55 |
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RevBudGreen
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I'm not one who is much into those "Psyhic feelings", but my fiance' definately is. She goes and sees a psychic every once in a while. Some of the things that she says and then happens has made me wonder how much there really is to it all.
The best advice I can give you is be aware of those around you and the things they say and do. Your friend that you say gave no warning more then likely did. The problem is none of us want to believe that someone we love is in that frame of mind so we most often miss the signs either until it's to late or something close to that happens.
I know looking back at a couple of people I've known that have committed suicide, once the shock wears off and you are able to rationalize it, you will think "Damn it was there and I missed it". But don't beat yourself up over it. It wasn't yours or anyone else's fault. The best thing you can do is learn from it, and take solace in knowing your friend is at peace now with the pain they were feeling. Just be more alert and learn to pay closer attention to what people say.
PETA....IT'S WHAT'S FOR DINNER
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| 04/30/08 17:10 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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Yeah I have become more and more into those sorts of feelings. But i know for sure he hadn't given any signs towards it, I know you where saying about he probably did and I didn't pick up on it, but this time i definatly know there was nothing to warn us. As I said I'm a very empathetic person and I know when something is wrong, almost all my friends will say that for me. There really was no warning on him doing it, I've been in an experiance like this before and this was definatly different, something just isn't right. I'm just going to try look back on his time alive, rather than dwell on the situation now, I just hope these feelings don't lead to anything more.
Well i'm off for tonight, need to rest. I had the feeling of being visted last night (not sure if it was for good or bad reasons) so i kind of hope it will happen again tonight so i can clear my head up about things. I see a lot in dreams, I know it sounds cheesy but I really believe in this sort of stuff.
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 04/30/08 17:17 |
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Deathaxe
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Jaffar, I'm sorry for your loss. I -exactly- knows what it feels like when a good friend commits suicide. The same happened to me. Good luck getting your life on track again.
Apprime Above Everything [Apr]
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| 04/30/08 17:28 |
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Blazings
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| QUOTE | | I had the feeling of being visted last night (not sure if it was for good or bad reasons) so i kind of hope it will happen again tonight so i can clear my head up about things. |
You hope it will happen again? It would really scare the sh*t out of me when that happend (and I'm being serious here).
If you read this.. I hope you sleep (and dream) well.
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| 04/30/08 17:36 |
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Chrisworld
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Very odd indeed, I am sorry for your loss.
Nothing more i can say other than i myself believe in strange feelings and stuff such as this jumping from other people or being shared by people.
Gameamp Guides [AMP]
~ Playing Guildwars Since 3/19/06 ~ [AMP] Member since November 2007 ~
~ Playing Everquest II Since 7/21/07 ~
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| 04/30/08 17:37 |
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Calypso_FtW
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v.sorry for ur loss dude, must suck bad ;/
| QUOTE | had the feeling of being visted last night (not sure if it was for good or bad reasons) so i kind of hope it will happen again tonight so i can clear my head up about things.
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what u mean? being watched? u think like ufo's came to u or what lol
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| 04/30/08 17:38 |
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Chrisworld
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| QUOTE | v.sorry for ur loss dude, must suck bad ;/
| QUOTE | had the feeling of being visted last night (not sure if it was for good or bad reasons) so i kind of hope it will happen again tonight so i can clear my head up about things.
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what u mean? being watched? u think like ufo's came to u or what lol |
I think he means by a ghost.
I also felt this a few years ago i was on the computer (playing games of course) i genuinely felt like there was someone in the room with me, i didn't know who it could be but i knew it was someone visiting, i started thinking about my grandparents and started to get a little sad/happy sad that they passed but happy to know they arent far.. It was really weird.
***THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED***
Gameamp Guides [AMP]
~ Playing Guildwars Since 3/19/06 ~ [AMP] Member since November 2007 ~
~ Playing Everquest II Since 7/21/07 ~
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| 04/30/08 17:41 |
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Calypso_FtW
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| QUOTE | I think he means by a ghost.
I also felt this a few years ago i was on the computer (playing games of course) i genuinely felt like there was someone in the room with me, i didn't know who it could be but i knew it was someone visiting, i started thinking about my grandparents and started to get a little sad/happy sad that they passed but happy to know they arent far.. It was really weird. |
that's just scary now :(
i saw too many vids about that kinda stuff, freaks me out...as i believe in it :o
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| 04/30/08 17:44 |
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Aeon
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I'm sorry for your loss.
I do, however disagree about any "feelings" you may be experiencing at the moment.
I for one, do not believe in the existence of ghosts, psychics, supernatural occurences, etc., but that's the point of this thread isn't to debate whether or not any of it is true or not, and eventually reaching the conclusion that there's no proof either way; so I will focus more upon why I believe your "feelings" are nothing out of the ordinary.
Somebody who was close to you has just died - if that wasn't bad enough, it was completely sudden, and by his own hand. The shock associated with both his death, and his want to die are enough to make you, and I really don't mean this in an offensive way, not quite with it. You will be twitchy for a while, and exaggerate small things like a small draught as being something else. Remember, there's no point in trying to find a reason - some things just happen, but more to the point, whether you could have changed it or not, you could never have known and, the likelihood is, there really is nothing you could have done, even if you think there is. You're probably already in a bad enough state as it is, without trying to heap blame onto yourself too.
Another thing I believe is that his name is now a gap. The name is there, but there is no physical embodiment of it anymore. Some of these "feelings" you are having may be due to you not wanting to face that he will no longer be there. That is not a dig at you - it is completely normal.
These two things together are probably contributing to the thought that he visited you. Firstly, the fact that you still want him to be there, and then the twitchiness enhancing any environmental effects to make you associate the two together. As I have stated before, I do not believe in ghosts - if you do, that is your choice, and you can choose to think whatever you want.
Of course, if this visitor ghost version of him does anything malevolent, do not let it taint your memory of him as a person - he was your friend, the fact that he kept things locked up shows that he didn't want you to worry about him, which in my opinion is a much better quality than somebody telling you every tiny detail about their lives.
Next, about the fact that you all felt the same - are you sure it is nothing to do with the fact you are all in the same state of shock, with all the increased awareness etc etc, and that a want for normality and (this isn't really the right phrase) the ease with which friends can influence each other? What I mean by this is Friend 1 says about the feeling, then Friend 2 thinks that that is a good rationalisation, and so says they felt the exact same thing.
Yes, it is a big coincidence, but far more eyebrow-raising things have happened.
Don't read too much into people texting you. Since the person was close to you, they may be worried you will do the same, or something along the same lines. As long as you are comfortable with it, just let them check up on you - to stop them worrying.
If anything I've said here seems a bit harsh, I'm sorry, but I've never been good with choosing words and euphamising.
Once again, I'm sorry for your loss.
Questionable Tactics [Hax]
4th reform. GOGO!
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| 04/30/08 18:09 |
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Suria
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Sorry about the loss :(
Death is always unexpected, therefore you have to expect the unexpected.
Also, if you wish to have a cure to your odd feelings do some Math ! You'll be in a perfect world were everything can be explained and it will help you clear your mind.
Take care.
Mutants Guild [MU]
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| 04/30/08 19:12 |
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Belshazaarswrath
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I'm sorry to hear that man. I have been feeling really weird recently too...sort of like you described. Also a close friend of mines son died recently...committed suicide.
I dunno it's probably just angst for me. But for the other people? I dunno. Maybe it's some kind of psychic connection if you believe in that sort of thing.
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| 04/30/08 19:45 |
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dunkoro_flagger
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not the first person to say this but there are no connections between people even twisn so feelings are different internally. As for your loss, either friend or accquaitance you should not feel guilty if you feel that way, my thoughts to his family. Only thing i belive in internal "stuff" is ki-mai
besides things you feel that you think other do also can just be caused by nerve receptors,glands or just one of your five senses.
***THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED***
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| 04/30/08 21:24 |
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MoonliteNite
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dude..you totally broke my heart with your story
I really hope you feel better =)
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| 05/01/08 00:30 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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Thank you so much everyone, talking to people is really helping me with this =) I'll try to reply individualy to different posts but sorry if i miss yours, theres so much I want to say =)
| QUOTE | | QUOTE | | I had the feeling of being visted last night (not sure if it was for good or bad reasons) so i kind of hope it will happen again tonight so i can clear my head up about things. |
You hope it will happen again? It would really scare the sh*t out of me when that happend (and I'm being serious here).
If you read this.. I hope you sleep (and dream) well. |
Yeah I did want it to happen again as it wasn't a scary feeling at all (and I did mean by a spirit tpye being as chris said)it was more of a happy feeling =) nothing happened though. I slept suprisingly well. The main thing to think about is if you are visited by anything you beleive to be a spirit of a family member you can 99% be sure they're not trying to halm you =)
Thank you very much for your reply Aeon, I didn't find it harsh at all, it's nice to reassurance from different view points, I enjoyed reading your post.
| QUOTE | | Next, about the fact that you all felt the same - are you sure it is nothing to do with the fact you are all in the same state of shock, with all the increased awareness etc etc, and that a want for normality and (this isn't really the right phrase) the ease with which friends can influence each other? What I mean by this is Friend 1 says about the feeling, then Friend 2 thinks that that is a good rationalisation, and so says they felt the exact same thing. |
I was going to say something about this, the funny thing is that they didn't know about what happened to my friend at that time, and had no hint towards how I was feeling. That's why i found it so strange, it wasn't like person 2 was just agreeing to make the other one feel better, we all had the same feelings but had described them to different people before we had talked to eachother about them. And then when another friend randomly started saying he was feeling worried about something in guildchat we started to realise this was indeed quite odd. Anyway I don't feel so abd now, I'm just keeping my chin up and remembering the good times =)
| QUOTE | | Also, if you wish to have a cure to your odd feelings do some Math ! You'll be in a perfect world were everything can be explained and it will help you clear your mind. |
You know what, that's fantastic advice =) strangely I was doing math all day yesterday, gave me something to focus on (and I also need to revise for Exams), really strange you should say that ^^
| QUOTE | | Jaffar, I'm sorry for your loss. I -exactly- knows what it feels like when a good friend commits suicide. The same happened to me. Good luck getting your life on track again. |
I remember you saying about that, thank you =)
| QUOTE | I'm sorry to hear that man. I have been feeling really weird recently too...sort of like you described. Also a close friend of mines son died recently...committed suicide.
I dunno it's probably just angst for me. But for the other people? I dunno. Maybe it's some kind of psychic connection if you believe in that sort of thing. |
Sorry to hear that, it realy is awfull. I feel the worst for his parents as I do with my friends mum, her husband and son have both been taken from her within 2 months.
| QUOTE | dude..you totally broke my heart with your story
I really hope you feel better =) |
Thank you =) all of these replies are really helping me out, thank you so much to everyone who's left a reply they really are helping me come to terms with things, every comment really means something to me. Sorry if I sound like some extreme spiritualist type person (I guess in this sort of situation it has given me something to focus on) I just believe in links between peoples emotions and feelings I guess. I'm not normaly the tpye of person who's interested in ghosts and spirits/spirituality, but I like to leave my mind open to new ideas, and I guess with my mind upside down it's become something more for me.
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 05/01/08 04:51 |
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itsthatemochild
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im really sorry about your loss dude. i cant say i know entirely how you feel, but one of my good friends attempted suicide (tried to hang himself from his fan) but someone found him just in time. since he got out of the psych ward hes been an entirely different person, started wearing tons of makeup and acting like a 5 year old. not saying its good your friend died, but consider the alternative- someone who is so miserable they try to end their life, and cant even succeed at that. they wouldnt be the person you knew.
"The most merciful thing in the world... is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents." -H.P. Lovecraft
"He who is not radical at twenty has no heart,
while he who is still radical at forty has no brain."
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| 05/01/08 06:07 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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| QUOTE | | im really sorry about your loss dude. i cant say i know entirely how you feel, but one of my good friends attempted suicide (tried to hang himself from his fan) but someone found him just in time. since he got out of the psych ward hes been an entirely different person, started wearing tons of makeup and acting like a 5 year old. not saying its good your friend died, but consider the alternative- someone who is so miserable they try to end their life, and cant even succeed at that. they wouldnt be the person you knew. |
Yeah I know what you mean, sometimes they feel it's all they can do to stop it. Sorry to hear about your friend having to live like that.
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 05/01/08 06:17 |
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CorruptNinja
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I can relate to you, back in '03 I lost my Grandfather (on my Step Dads side) He was like a 2nd Dad to me. in '04 I lost my Grandmother (on my step dads side) and in '05 I lost my other Grandfather to Cancer. So losing someone close to you 3 years in a row isnt fun.
I occasionally get the feeling im being watched only to turn around and no ones there. Im not the Religious type, I dont believe in any of it, but that isnt the point of this thread. I have had things happen i cant explain though. Like this one time i opened the cabinet and one of those huge knives (almost like a machette) fell out and i felt something bump me and it moved me out of the way. I probably wouldnt be here typing this if i hadnt moved.
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| 05/01/08 07:23 |
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jaffar_al_kahyet
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| QUOTE | I can relate to you, back in '03 I lost my Grandfather (on my Step Dads side) He was like a 2nd Dad to me. in '04 I lost my Grandmother (on my step dads side) and in '05 I lost my other Grandfather to Cancer. So losing someone close to you 3 years in a row isnt fun.
I occasionally get the feeling im being watched only to turn around and no ones there. Im not the Religious type, I dont believe in any of it, but that isnt the point of this thread. I have had things happen i cant explain though. Like this one time i opened the cabinet and one of those huge knives (almost like a machette) fell out and i felt something bump me and it moved me out of the way. I probably wouldnt be here typing this if i hadnt moved. |
Gosh that must have been really hard for you, sorry to hear about your loss. At least you know they would have lived to see their grandson grow up, I'm sure that would have been one of the best things for them =) And also yeah i'm neither religous or (normaly) very spiritual, but as you have said I have things which I can't explain, so sometimes I look to new ways of thinking to try and explain them.
Age of Conan: Aeson ~ Battlescar [PvP-En] ~ Cimmerian Barbarian
Guildwars: Tydus of Ascalon ~ Proud Leader of The Preschool Teaparty Massacre [Opal]
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| 05/01/08 13:42 |
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